on the high price of china

clap for torro tomorrow
no pain; suture, suture;
feeling sew-sew is
applause, a bull, future.

because even care bears have agendas...

so we're taking stock in a shoppers drug mart today, and i'm in the kids greeting cards.
and one in aprticular catches my eye.
it features a couple of care bears on the cover, and the message on the front says...
"birthdays are made for caring and sharing!"

well, of course they are, if you're a care bear! what else are you going to say? birthdays are made for debauchery? this is like a car salesman saying "birthdays are made for brand new convertibles."

you can't trust anyone with an agenda... too much chance of ulterior motives. those care bears. how about taking a break from all their "caring" propoganda and thinking about someone ELSE for a while?

selfish bastards.

next time i'll get it right

it was all a mistake...
it was all a misunderstanding.
all the pretty things break
when they come in too hard for the landing.
pieces of ache,
shiny shards still, lost and fragmented.
i didn't mean it to break...
but when i said i loved you, i meant it.

strike three... you're out!

when you hit all the pins in bowling, it's a strike. when you miss the ball completely in baseball, it's a strike. when you work diligently to an end, you strike. when you do no work at all, you're on strike. to strike a flame is to create it. to strike a paragraph is to delete it. when pirates attack your ship, they strike. when you lower your flag in surrender, you strike. to strike fear is to plant it. to strike camp is to uproot it.
but what do i know... i'm just trying to strike up a conversation.
:^)

the paradox of trial's manufacture

there is no freedom without price.
men fear most the loss of freedom.
so much so that they invent the machinations of war and bondage to maintain the fragile illusion and deliberately grandiose value of peace.
because without paying a price, without making a sacrifice, peace seems unjustified, unreal, undeserved, and without personal meaning.
this is why Christianity frightens men so.
because the freedom is a gift, and the peace that passes all understanding also passes all earthly claims. men cannot put their own name to the peace of Christ, because it is Christ's gift. they cannot plant their flag in the soil because a cross already stands firmly planted in the earth they tread.
this makes men nervous.
this makes the peace of Christ something apparently intangible, because it is so huge, and most simply don't understand that the scale of the peace itself is what eliminates the possibility, and more importantly the necessity, of weighing any earthly offering against it. men are so much smaller than this peace that it will never be possible to earn it. and yet we still strive, still we lock ourselves in small bondages and rejoice in the overcoming so that the power and peace of Christ can at last be something concrete, because it triumphed over something equally conctete.
presidents create war because it creates and reinforces their illusions of peace, power and prosperity. men war with themselves because at the end of the day, they would like to believe that their salvation was a product of their cunning and resiliance, that they were integral to their own overcoming.
but if they overcame, it is only because Christ has overcome the world. of course, if this holds true, then Christ has also overcome the illusions, the tacky inventions of desperation that make men imagine struggles for themselves to hoist themselves above other men and rise to be more than they are.
this, too, is illusion... men are only what God makes them, and any more within them is found only in the biblical paradox of making themselves smaller so that Christ might increase. and perhaps this is what truly drives our desperation, what lays siege to our lives and gives us the subtle motivation to apply unnecessary bonds and trials to out otherwise exalted futures... because we think that the only way to make ourselves less is to struggle in the mire of human tribulation, and the only wat to make ourselves more is to overcome that mire and our sinful former selves.
which means that our focus, as ever, is still all too firmly planted on ourselves, and not, as we delude ourselves to believe, on Chirst at all. it is only our own image of Christ as he directly applies to our own lives that we see, only the reflection of Christ in our shoddy brass mirror that we mistake for the glory of the Son of God.
how ridiculously pompous.
how contrary to the things God would have for us.
how cowardly.
to face a foe we know, one we understand because we build it ourselves, and believe that in facing soemthing of the earth, we will rise above its decay?
when we know full well that we do not fight against flesh and blood but against the principalities and powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
and we do not fight them with the sword, or with our egos, or with our brilliance or knowledge or savvy or clever words or actions that impress those around us. we fight them with the solitary tool that Christ has given us. Love.
love is what unravels all of these illusions and brings the truth to the fore.
because all the rest, all the war and all the turmoil and all the little things we put into place to justify ourselves and our place in this world, not to mention our hopes of our place in the next world, do not flow from love. love does not destroy. love does not take aim at the innocent, love does not cripple nations. fear does these things.
we live in a world that is afraid.
a world afraid of judgment. a world afraid of being wrong. a world afraid of itself. and most of all, a world that becomes more afraid the less it understands, a world whose fears increase as the object of their incomprehension grows.
a world afraid of peace.
because this peace passes all understanding. not some. All.
fortunately for us, there is a flipside to this equation of peace and hope, if we can only grasp it with something more thana our flawed intellects and learned reactions.
the reciprocal we need is simply this:
the lack of peace does not pass all understanding.
this means that we should be able, with the help of the Holy Spirit (which leads us into all truth, after all) to understand the lack of peace.
and once we understand why peace is absent, we can finally stop doing the things that create that absence.
it will not make us understand the peace that follows, it will simply make room, in our world and in our hearts, for that peace to come.
in the end, there is only either the acceptance of a peace beyond comprehension or the perpetuation of petty violences in the name of understanding a peace that does not actually exist.
we remain deluded only so long as we choose. there is only the illusion of peace while men deceive themselves. it is only after deception ends that truth can reign.

a quiz of sorts.

Bold the true ones and add a truth of your own. something i found on someone's blog somewhere that seemed like a good idea.

I've consumed alcohol.
I've run away from home.
I have lied to my parents about where I am.
I don't like Bush because he is dumb.
I don't like Bush with my own reasons to back it up.
I am for Bush.
I listen to political music.
I collect comic books.
I am shorter than 5'5.
I think I'm ugly.
I shut others out when I'm depressed.
I open up to others easily.
I am keeping a secret from the world.
I watch the news.
I own over 5 rap CDs.
I own an iPod or MP3 player.
I own multiple designer purses, costing over $100 a piece.
I own something from Hot Topic.
I have a shirt my dad got me.
I own something from Pac Sun.
I own something from The Gap.
I own something I got on e-bay.
I love Disney Movies.
I am a sucker for hair/eyes.
I don't kill bugs.
I curse regularly.
I paid for that cell phone ring.
I am a sports fanatic.
I have "x"s in my screen name.
I've slipped out an "lol" in a real conversation.
I love Spam.
I bake well.
I would wear pajamas to school.
I own something from Abercrombie.
I have a job.
I love Martha Stewart.
I am in love with love.
I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
I am self conscious.
I like to laugh.
I smoke a pack a day.
I liked Perks of Being a Wallflower.
I liked Go Ask Alice.
I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
I can't swallow pills.
I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.
I eat fast food weekly.
I have many scars. (just not physical)
I believe in ghosts.
I am really ticklish.
I see a therapist.
I take anti-depressants. (sometimes)
I love white chocolate.
I bite my nails.
I am comfortable with being me.
I play video games.
I'm single.
I'm in a relationship.
I'm married. (legally, anyway)
Gotten lost in my city.
Saw a shooting star.
Wished on a shooting star.
Saw a meteor shower.
I had a serious surgery.
Gone out in public in your pajamas.
I have kissed a stranger.
Hugged a stranger.
Been in a fist fight.
Been arrested.
Laughed and had milk or another drink come out of your nose.
Pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
Made out in an elevator.
Swore at your parents.
Kicked a guy where it hurts.
Been close to love.
So close I fell in.
Been to a casino.
Been skydiving.
Broken a bone.
Skipped school.
Played spin the bottle.
Gotten stitches.
Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
Bitten someone.
Been to Niagara Falls.
Gotten the chicken pox.
Crashed into a friend's car.
Been to Japan.
Ridden in a taxi.
Shoplifted.
Been fired.
Had a crush on someone of the same sex.
Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
Stole something from your job.
Gone on a blind date.
Had a crush on a teacher.
Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
Been to Europe.
Slept with a co-worker.
Been married.
Gotten divorced.
Had children.
Been to Africa.
Driven over 400 miles in one day.
Been to Canada.
Been to Mexico.
Been on a plane.
Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Thrown up in a bar.
Eaten sushi.
Been snowboarding.
Been skiing.
Met someone in person from the internet.
Been to a moto cross show.
Lost a child.
Gone to college.
Graduated college.
Done hard drugs.
Had someone cheat on you.
Miss someone right now.
Taken painkillers when you didn't need them.
Woke up crying.
Cried yourself to sleep.
Peed from laughing.
Had sex.
Watched the guy/girl you liked make out with someone else.
Accidentally made yourself vomit.
Kept a journal for more than a year.
Read more than five books in one week.
Have a website.
Hate baths.
Dance when no one else is.
Create imaginary friends.
Refer to actors by the name of a favorite character they portrayed.
Love bruises.
Have sat on the roof.
Stayed out past curfew.
Ignored people 'cause they weren't popular.
Love rain.
Have baked a pie.
Have grown to hate the summer.
I am squeamish.
Scuba dived.
Have intentionally set something on fire besides a candle.
Wondered why school exists past grade 6.
Wished you were the opposite gender.
Didn't know who your best friend was.
Have lived with over twenty animals in the same house at one time.
has an obsession off something
Got so drunk you slept on the stairs
Don't really care what people think about you
Danced -while- watching The Rocky Horror Picture Show
think i'm stupid for thinking things will get better.

dumb people, newspapers, and the waste of ink...

great article in the paper monday...
discussing a proposed curfew in saskatoon.
this is what Coun. Tiffany Paulsen had to say on the subject...
"there's no doubt when you see a six-year-old running around at 11 o'clock at night, there is a problem. but often that problem is that they've come from a dysfunctional home."
holy crap.
i mean, i thought for sure that 6-year-olds running the streets at night was the very definition of functionality. but it's a problem? i'm blown away.
but wait, she expands on this bit of brilliance...
"...and simply taking them back to an abusive situation is not solving any problems, and is likely making them worse."
wow.
so now, not only is it a problem that kids are fleeing their abusive homes in the middle of the night and spending all kinds of unsupervised time on city streets, but -
-get this now-
it's NOT helping them to just take them back to the abuse. returning them to their crappy home isn't "solving the problem".
THAT, my friends, is profound.
but she's not even done...
we flip the page to the continuation of the article, and get one more nugget of intelligence...
"it's a lot more difficult to vandalize or cause crime in the middle of the street as opposed to a hiding place in a park"
man, is there no end to the brilliant conclusions she can draw seemingly out of nothing but air, print, and glaringly obvious fact?
so, we've basically learned that kids who are outside the house at 11 pm have problems at home, that taking them back to an abusive situation won't solve the problem, and that it's easier to vandalize a hiding place in a dimly lit park than it is to spray paint "i'm retarded" on the mail-box under a streetlamp.
shocking.
well, i think we've absorbed all we can, it's time to sit back and reflect on this for a while, ponder the deeper meaning of this seeming bunch of crap.
but please, if you come to any conclusions about it that you know everyone else is already well aware of, just keep it out of my newspaper.