looking for the point of balance...
there is a woman at work, she says things with absolute confidence. but often, she's wrong. and she just says things anyway, as though they were the absolute truth, like she knows, like she has all the answers. and when she's wrong, there's always a "reason", very seldom involving her just simply making a mistake. but all it really does is make her look ignorant and indifferent.
my approach, on the other hand, is almost always one of defferral... even if i'm fairly certain i'm right, if it's not one hundred per cent, i will typically accept what the other person says... and then, when i turn out to be right, i feel like i should have been more confident, because the way i hide from what i know makes me seem like nothing but a wimp, a coward, and a child.
so, how to have confidence in myself without coming across as a fool... how to be bold, and daring, and not fear the consequences for once.
i have NO idea.
posted by Corus Aquilo @ 7:18 PM
2 Comments:
that is always a difficult thing: to balance.
i mean really, to have the confidence to give out a point while maintaining some form of dignity and wisdom.
perhaps this is the meaning of wisdom? perhaps this is something that comes with age?
certainly, i have yet to find that balance.
to badu1965... i'm not sure i know you, or that i necessarily have to justify every aparant contradiction to those who read my posts... but this one, i will address.
the key conflict lies in the power exchange. when the knowledge of my rightness is greater than my understanding of or belief in the relevant qualities of the other person, my ego becomes convinced of it's superiority and will not relinquish the point for fear of being reduced again. if, however, the other person in question presents with behaviours that minimize me, such as a stronger ego, a belittling demeanour, a blatant disregard for feelings that i often confuse for power, then i shrink, suddenly overwhelmed by my insecurities, and then even the truth is not enough to supercede their confidence, right or not.
Post a Comment
<< Home